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티끌모아 로망스

너 그 아프리카 영양알지. 치타한테 잡아먹히는 애들. 너 걔들한테 제일 중요한게 뭔줄 알아? 그건 치타보다 빨리 뛰는게 아니라 다른 영양들보다 더 빨리 뛰는 거야 You know the antelopes in Africa, don’t you? Those that cheetahs prey on. Do you know what’s most important to them? It’s not running faster than the cheetah, but to be much faster than the other antelopes.


사람은 말야, 두 가지 일을 하고 살아야 되거든? 하고 싶은 일, 그리고 해야 할 일. 그런데 네 머릿속에는 온통 해야 할 일뿐이야. 하고 싶은 일이 끼어들 틈이 없는 거지, 틈이. 그게 버릇이 되면 나중에 어떻게 되느냐. 나중에는 자기가 진짜 하고 싶은 일이 뭔지도 모르게 돼요. 생각해 봐, 이 얼마나 슬픈 일이야?

There are two things people live for: the things they want to do and the things they have to do. But your mind is so full of the things you have to accomplish that there’s no room left. What if that becomes a habit? You’ll be completely unknown to the things that you want to do. Think about it, isn’t that really sad?


행복? 사람은 행복해지려고 하니까 불행해지는 거야 Happiness? People are unhappy because they try too hard to be happy.


사람들이 뭔가를 살때 착각하는게 뭔줄 알아? 바로 필요한것과 원하는 걸 구분할 줄 모른다는 거야. 그리고 원하는 것들 중에는 대부분이 필요없는 것들이구 Do you know why people live in an illusion? Because they can’t differentiate between the things they want to have and the things they need to have. And among the things that they want are mostly the things that they don’t need.



한번은 밥을 먹다가 연두와 유리에게 물어봤어요. 이 일이 있기 전과 있은 후의 제일 달라진게 뭐냐구. 아이들이 그러더라구요. 우리도 다른 사람들과 똑같이 소중한 사람들이란걸 알게된거요. 이렇게 잘 커가는 아이들을 보면서 그런 생각이 들었어요. 우리가 싸워야하는 건, 세상을 바꾸기 위해서가 아니라, 세상이 우리를 바꾸지 못하게 하기 위해서라고.

날씨가 많이 추워졌어요. 겨울이 추운건, 곁에 있는 사람의 온기가 얼마나 소중한지 알게 해주기 위해서래요.
지금은 곁에 없지만, 아이들과 저의 온기가 아저씨에게 전해지길.. 기도할게요.

There was a time, while we were eating, I asked Yeondu and Yuri, “what’s the biggest difference between then and now?” They told me, “we’ve come to realize that we, too, just like everyone else, are capable of being treasured.” When I look at these kids who have matured well, a thought like this came into my mind: The things that we have to fight for, aren’t to change the world, but to not let it change us.

The weather has gotten really cold. Winter, its chilliness allows us to appreciate the warmth that comes from the people around us.

Even though we can’t be with you right now, I pray that the children’s warmth, along with mine, will reach you.

What Alice Forgot

What Alice Forgot – Liane Moriarty

“Imagine forgetting the most important ten years of your life.”

“The problem was that she couldn’t attach herself to a ‘today’ or a ‘yesterday’ or even a last week. She was floating helplessly above the calendar like an escaped balloon.”

“But then again, other times, I walk on to the stage and I feel like there is some weight pressing on the back of my neck, making my head droop and my back hunch, like an old crone. I want to put my mouth close to the microphone and say, ‘What is the point of all this, ladies and gentlemen? You all seem like nice enough people, so help me out and tell me, what is the point?

Actually, I do know the point.

The point is they’re helping pay the mortgage. They’re each making a contribution to our groceries and our electricity and our water and our Visa bill. They’re all generously chipping in for the syringes and the shapeless hospital gowns and that last anaesthetist with the kind, doggy eyes who held my hand and said, ‘Go to sleep now, darling.’ Anyway, I digress. You want me to digress. You want me to just write and write whatever comes to my mind. I wonder if you find me boring. You always look so gently interested, but maybe you have days where I walk in the office looking all needy, bursting to tell you the pathetic details of my life, and you just long to put your elbows on your desk and your chin in your hands and say, ‘What is the point of all this, Elisabeth?’ and then you remember that the point is that I am paying for your Visa bill, mortgage, groceries… and so the world goes round.”

“You mentioned the other day that a feeling of pointlessness is a sign of depression, but you see there, I don’t have depression because I do see a point. Money is the point.”

“Maybe temporary insanity is just an excuse for inexcusable behaviour.”

“I’m too much of a control freak to have other people falling about laughing while they describe my own actions to me.”

“It’s 3.30 a.m. in the morning and sleep feels like something impossible and stupid that only other people do.”

예감은 틀리지 않는다

The Sense of an Ending – Julian Barnes.

“그러나 결국 기억하게 되는 것은, 실제로 본 것과 언제나 똑같지는 않은 법이다
What you end up remembering isn’t always the same as what you have witnessed.”

“What did I know of life, I who had lived so carefully? Who had neither won nor lost, but just let life happen to him? Who had the usual ambitions and settled all too quickly for them not being realised? Who avoided being hurt and called it a capacity for survival? Who paid his bills, stayed on good terms with everyone as far as possible, for whom ecstasy and despair soon became just words once read in novels? One whose self-rebukes never really inflicted pain? Well, there was all this to reflect upon, while I endured a special kind of remorse: a hurt inflicted at long last on one who always thought he knew how to avoid being hurt – and inflicted for precisely that reason.”

“But I’ve been turning over in my mind the question of nostalgia, and whether I suffer from it. I certainly don’t get soggy at the memory of some childhood knickknack; nor do I want to deceive myself sentimentally about something that wasn’t even true at the time—love of the old school, and so on. But if nostalgia means the powerful recollection of strong emotions—and a regret that such feelings are no longer present in our lives—then I plead guilty.”

“We live in time – it holds us and molds us – but I never felt I understood it very well. And I’m not referring to theories about how it bends and doubles back, or may exist elsewhere in parallel versions. No, I mean ordinary, everyday time, which clocks and watches assure us passes regularly: tick-tock, click-clock. Is there anything more plausible than a second hand? And yet it takes only the smallest pleasure or pain to teach us time’s malleability. Some emotions speed it up, others slow it down; occasionally, it seems to go missing – until the eventual point when it really does go missing, never to return.”

“When you’re young – when I was young – you want your emotions to be like the ones you read about in books. You want them to overturn your life, create and define a new reality. Later, I think, you want them to do something milder, something more practical: you want them to support your life as it is and has become. You want them to tell you that things are OK. And is there anything wrong with that?”

“Also, when you are young, you think you can predict the likely pains and bleaknesses that age might bring. You imagine yourself being lonely, divorced, widowed; children growing away from you, friends dying. You imagine the loss of status, the loss of desire – and desirability. You may go further and consider your own approaching death, which, despite what company you may muster, can only be faced alone. But all this is looking ahead. What you fail to do is look ahead, and then imagine yourself looking back from the future point. Learning the new emotions that time brings. Discovering, for example, that as the witnesses to your life diminish, there is less corroboration, and therefore less certainty, as to what you are or have been. Even if you have assiduously kept records – in words, sound, pictures – you may find that you have attended to the wrong kind of record-keeping. What was the line Adrian used to quote? ‘History is that certainty produced at the point where the imperfections of memory meet the inadequacies of documentation.”

“And then there is the question on which so much depends, of how we react to the damage: whether we admit it or repress it,and how this affects our dealings with others. Some admit the damage, and try to mitigate it; some spend their lives trying to help others who are damaged; and there are those whose main concern is to avoid further damage to themselves, at whatever cost. And those are the ones who are ruthless, and the ones to be careful of.”

“Sometimes I think the purpose of life is to reconcile us to its eventual loss by wearing us down, by proving, however long it takes, that life isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.”

Daydream Nation

“You can never really tell what’s good until later anyway, until you look back and think about things and they have time to grow in your mind. But sometimes you make a choice in that moment and you know in your heart it’s going to change everything. People will tell you nothing matters, the whole world’s about to end soon anyway. But those people are looking at life the wrong way. I mean, things don’t need to last forever to be perfect.”

— Caroline Wexler, Daydream Nation

“I’m not here to save you, I’m the main character of my own life.”

— Caroline Wexler, Daydream Nation

The Art of Getting By

“Since the dawn of recorded history, something like 110 billion human beings have been born into this world.  And not a single one of them made it.  There are 6.8 billion people on the planet.  Roughly 60 million of them die every year. 60 million people.  That comes out to about 160,000 per day.  I read this quote once when I was a kid, “We live alone, we die alone.  Everything else is just an illusion. ”  It used to keep me up at night.  We all die alone.  So, why am I supposed to spend my life working, sweating, struggling? For an illusion?  Because no amount of friends, no girl, no assignments about conjugating the pluperfect or determining the square root of the hypotenuse is gonna help me avoid my fate.  I have better things to do with my time.”

“I need to tell you something. You were right, in a way, I should’ve been able to say what I wanted to. I’m in love with you. I always have been. I thought you were the unfair one, but it was unfair of me not to say it. So I’ve said it. I was nothing. I felt like nothing. Less than. You changed it.”

“I actually felt something. That doesn’t always happen, it hasn’t happened in a very long time… and I have lived long enough to know that when it does, you should act on it.”

“You know we’re going to be together one day, we just have to sort through all of our messed up issues first, and you have a lot of girls to sleep with to get out of your system.”

“You’re going to have to start using that brain of yours to access that talent of yours to show that beautiful heart of yours.”

“There are so many more important things to think about, homework ends up seeming like an afterthought”

– The Art of Getting By

Unspoken words are like flower petals that peeled from where they belong or the drifting twigs that get washed away by the waves. They once held a life, they once held a meaning. Most of the time we lock them up in a little box and leave them to gather dust, when they could have been kicking lively on the tips of our tongues, waiting to be free. As if that’s not enough, we throw the key away, bury them deep underground, and wait till they decompose, till they cease to exist. The sad fact is that we don’t have complete control over what we do to them. And you know what’s even more heart-wrenching? Knowing their power to change our lives, yet not having the ability to seize that chance.

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